FUNKY-HERD STAMPEDES OFF-COURSE
3 Emertons and the Champ Remain
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Fair or not, one of the themes running through the FunkyPool 2006 has been
the lack of individual risk-taking while everyone watches the ultra-steady
Emerton Clan lead the way. This weeks wasn't exactly an aberration. With
half the pool facing elimination, and desperation practically required,
nobody picked the Redskins, nobody picked the Steelers, and only two
participants had the guts to go against the 3-point favorite Bears. For the
most part, the pack chose to make their move against the Broncos -- 5 of the
7 poolsters chasing the leader picked the Patriots. Everyone got the
Seahawks correct (everyone except Sabbe in the 2nd Chance Pool), but
everything else was backwards for the Slate-hopefuls: The Patriots lost by
14, the Steelers gave everyone a chance to gain 25 points on the leader, and
the Panthers pulled off the road win. The obvious result: The ultra-steady
Emertons are dominating the pool, and everyone else is eliminated.
The lone exception: Defending Champion Bill Ellis, who stayed with
the Broncos, went 2nd-lowest on the Colts, and picked the Panthers -- and
thus "won the week" by 17. The man is clearly not ready to give up the
Slate. He gained 20 points on the leader, but more importantly, he cleared
3rd-place Robert Hassanali by 53 and 4th-place Money Retsek by 37.
Along with the champ remain all three Emertons, clearly the greatest
"family dominance" this pool will ever see. Eric Emerton stayed with
all
four favored home teams, and even though he gave the every poolster a chance
to gain 55 points on him, he actually gained 18 points on his second-place
father. With a 48-point lead now, Eric is basically guaranteed a trip to
FunkyBowl, and is virtually assured of a considerable lead. Robert Emerton,
like half the pool, chose to make the Patriots his lone upset pick, and thus
picked only one game right. He is now 48 points out, and once a frontrunner
to win the Slate, he is now in a fight just to get past next weekend. Diane
Emerton, like her husband, played it smart -- all four favored home teams --
and slipped into the 4th and final spot when Hassanali and Retsek went
plummetting past her.
Jason Sullivan not only picked the Bears, but picked them for 17, and
thus he fell further than the rest of the pack. He finished in 8th place
overall, and though he's won a Slate, this was his 3rd-best season in 10
years of participation.
Actually, Robert Hassanali fell further than anybody -- he just had
more room to fall. Not only did he pick the Bears for 9, he had the Colts
and Seahawks higher than anybody (too high). After finishing the regular
season in 3rd place, Hassanali is eliminated in 7th place, the best season
he's had in his short career.
Despite a stong show last week, and a nice Carolina pick this week,
Funky Wyatt is eliminated in 6th place. He finished 4th place this week,
but he had the furthest to go to make the cut, and would've needed a Steeler
pick to catch Diane. Funky's 6th place finish follows a 3rd place finish
last year, the two best placements for him since the FunkyPool's first
season.
The final man cut this week was 2-time Champion Dylan "Money" Retsek,
who was still alive until time ran out on the Bears. His 5th place finish
is actually the 5th best in his career, and only 4 times has be finished
worse -- that's nasty.
Next week
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Once again, we have the ol' "Go for the Slate, or just survive?" dilemna
for
the three poolsters trailing E. Ellis, Emerton, and Emerton would all
dearly like to qualify for FunkyBowl X, but they'll have to play things a
bit crazy if they want anything more than a "SuperPick" chance at Eric
in
the big game. The good news for them is that the spread is less than a
touchdown for both games, so some considerably major swings are possible.
Eric, for his part, will probably play it conservatively again and try
to guarantee himself the biggest lead possible for the FunkyBowl, but you
never know -- he is a Panther fan. And what if he wants to play mindgames
with the desperate threesome behind him, and thwart their upset bids by
picking the same ones? Are the Emertons even speaking to each other this
week?
Or...what if he's simply sold on the Steelers? That's possible.
As far as precedent goes, Dylan Oliver showed what was possible in 2000,
when he was in 3rd place for Championship Weekend (like this one), 67 points
behind Eric himself. He was the only one who picked the Giants, who won by
41, and the only one to pick Baltimore, who won by 13. He gained 40 points
on Emerton (could've gained 75), and earned a decent shot in the FunkyBowl.
To earn anything more than a SuperPick chance at E, somebody is going to
have to pick opposite from him (or pick a major blowout) -- and nail them
both.
KenDoggie takes lead in 2nd-chance Playoffs
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It seems Wego is going to have to keep his receipt on that case of beer he
bought last week with his 2nd-chance "winnings." After claiming the prize
money was "already spent" at a local liquor store, Wengronowitz made the
same wanna-be-maverick Patriot upset pick that almost everybody else tried
to make, and lost his 2nd-chance stranglehold on the 2nd-chance pool.
KenDoggie picked the Panthers for 7, and he somehow rocked the pool with his
"solo shot" on the favored Broncos -- and now leads the kiddie pool by
19.
Mike Godsey was the only one in either pool to pick the Steelers (after
declaring "it's simple -- the Steelers will get a rush on him, and the
Mannings are pussies") and pulls into 3rd place.
Chris Sabbe deserves his own paragraph. After an atrociously atrocious
regular season, Sabbe missed all four games this weekend, including
*another* Redskin game and *another* Bronco game. He is now 104 points
behind KenDoggie.
See ya next week....
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