Dr. Taylor's Class is Immediately in Session

And you're tardy

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Here at Weekly Recap, we're not exactly sure who or what a Ken Taylor is, but based on the search engine Google.com, the most likely possibility is that he's a professor at Stanford who has written a paper titled, "Toward a Naturalist Theory of Rational Intentionality."  If so, we might be in trouble--his rational mind won the week in the only FMNFLP pool he's ever been in.  It's also possible (according to wikipedia) that a Ken Taylor is instead a English cricketeer, a Chicago defensive back, or an Australian poet, in which case maybe he just got lucky.  In any case, we have a new leader, and his name is Ken Taylor.

    You might think it's awesome that Dr. Debutante lost his virginity in the first week after his coming out party, but he's not the first.  We think KenDog Vis did it (and then didn't win another week for like 5 years), and we think Zack Schwartz did the same thing.  And obviously, somebody won the first week of the pool (we think DOliver).  The stats aren't available right now, so just believe us.  The moral?  It's not a big deal, Ken.  Just write an Australian poem about it and then move on with your life.

    Three-time Slate winner Bill Ellis finished just 3 points off the pace, and 2-time Slate winner Chris Sabbe finished just 4 points off.  FunkyDome finalists Eric Emerton and Mike Godsey finished in 18th and 19th place, but not too far off the generally clogged-up pack.





In other news....putting the "Memorial" back in FMNFLP...



BAMF stashes powder blue dartboard, retires from pool, becomes vaporized

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Patrick Godsey once won a week with only 69 points, and once finished in last place with 81 points.  He once beat Money Retsek in one week by 79 points.  But the legend that is BAMF will go beyond weekly wins and weekly losses.  He was most famous for putting full boats on his Chargers (and then going to the actual games) and encouraging others to do the same in a uniquely provocative way.  After enduring years of the ultra-embarrassing "pink streak" (a record of 125 straight weeks with no weekly wins, that still stands today), he was publicly criticized for liberally quoting The Big Lebowski while skewering Mike McKean (Dave Winter called it "mean-spirited"), and then was generally silenced by the personal attacks that followed his Chargers' "logo-stomping" loss to the Patriots.  His smack filled the pages of the Smack Board, back when it was a bigger monster, and he was constantly nominated for POW and COW, back when that used to be a bigger monster (only two poolsters have more POWs and COWs--his brother Mike, and Jason Sullivan).  And as the sun sets on the POW voting process and the Smack Page, BAMF is riding off into the sunset after 12 years in the program.

    His ecstatic face is no longer on the FunkyDomers page, his smack is all erased, but his Charger Pride, his full boats, his pink streak, his witty banter, and really, a bygone era that he helped create, will be forever remembered by those who were there.





SchussDaddy reels it in, calls it quits

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Though he looked healthy enough to make football picks at the 10th Annual FDR fishing trip, Michael "SchussDeisel" SchussDaddy retired from the game after 11 years of competition.  Though he finished the season in the Top 5 on two different occasions, Schuss was more famous for his fun-lovin' picks that seemed to just reek of chewing tobacco and manliness.  He was 13th on the all-time list of weekly wins, but he was also 5th on the all-time list for last place finishes.  Beyond his weekly finishes, he is perhaps better known for his Jennings-like flashes of wit that make blabbermouths like Godsey seem a little verbose.  He is also the unquestioned Man when it comes to the Snicker Invitational Golf Tournament, manlove, the FDR fishing trip, keeping Chris Sabbe and Nate Bass in check, and he is still the defending champion (along with Jennings) in StadiumBall (back when the FunkO was a bigger monster).  Like BAMF, he will be missed here in FMNFLP, even as he's seen in other places.





Back to Week One....





You would've won if....

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Bill Ellis would've regained his dominating swagger and won the week if the Bills had hung on to their 9-point primetime lead.



Zach Schwartz would've won the week if the Titans would've held on (or if the Bears had won).



Chris Sabbe would've won the week if his rival Broncos hadn't pulled that crazy deflected miracle pass at the end of the game.





POW!  COW!

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Zach Schwartz doesn't get the weekly win, but thanks to his manly full boat on his J-E-T-S, he does earn his sixth and halfth Pick of the Week in just over four years of competition.  Speed Racer "earns" the COW for his not-so-spectacular 6 points on the Browns.





Next Week!  (Today!)

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Absolutely no rivalries (Adam's Browns at Kathy's Broncos?), but Zach is going to be at the Jets game, and BAMF (the last time he'll be mentioned) will be at the Chargers game.

Good times.

See ya then....